Hello beautiful Soul , it's Juliette, your hypnotherapist 🌸 Today we're going to talk about a subject that hurts the heart, but is so common: attraction to unavailable people or what I call the crumb syndrome because when we chase after unavailable people we settle for crumbs and it's very very sad.
Have you ever noticed that we sometimes have this tendency to be attracted to people who aren't really there for us? It could be someone who's already in a relationship, emotionally closed or less mature than us, or simply unable to commit. And yet, they're often the ones we want... And that ruins our lives.
Why does this happen?
Well, it's often deeper than we imagine. It's not just a major lapse in taste. It often stems from past wounds, fear of rejection or abandonment, or even an unconscious need to reproduce family patterns. Our nervous system is simply used to bending over backwards for people who don't have much to give. Someone distant, cold or complicated around? Yum: a cascade of dopamine, serotonin and oxytocin. We look for what we know, even if it hurts. We start chasing relationships where we have to fight or prove that we deserve the other person's love. It's as if we're trying to prove that we can be loved, but we're unconsciously choosing the wrong people to do it with.
And the problem is that we waste so much energy, time and, above all, our own self-worth.
How does this ruin our lives?
By chasing after unavailable people, we drain ourselves. We end up believing that we're never enough, that we don't deserve love, when it's quite the opposite. You feel rejected, hurt and your self-esteem takes a hit. It's like a never-ending race, where we give everything without ever receiving anything real in return. And that keeps us from seeing the beautiful people, the ones who could really offer us something healthy and balanced.
So how do we get out of this vicious circle? First of all, we have to become aware of this pattern. Why am I attracted to people who can't give me what I need? That's the first question to ask yourself.
Then, well, you have to work on yourself, on these past wounds. This is where hypnosis can really help. In a session, we'll try to free those old patterns, to reprogram your mind so that it stops looking for what hurts, and starts looking for what's good for you.
The most important thing is to learn to love yourself. And that sounds so counter-spoken spiritual, but in fact it's not an abstract thing at all. It's very concrete. Very concretely, learning to love yourself means anchoring within yourself this feeling of security, peace and appreciation, which then becomes your basic emotional imprint. We move from lack to love. From there, we attract healthy people who don't have time to waste playing childish games. When you know you deserve love, respect and someone who's really there for you, you stop accepting crumbs. You stop chasing shadows.
There are people out there who are ready to love you for who you are. So let go of the ones who aren't. You deserve so much better! You deserve so much better!
If what I've just said resonates with you, if you recognize yourself in these situations, know that there are solutions. You can free yourself from these patterns and finally build healthy, fulfilling relationships.
Make an appointment with me if you need help, I work on video and face-to-face in Nice, in French and English. I specialize in dealing with difficult childhood traumas and resolving the after-effects they leave behind in adulthood. I have the tools to help you make a real difference in your self-esteem and your relationships.
I send you lots of good vibes, take care of yourself and, above all, learn to choose yourself.
#sexandloveaddiction #hypnoseericksonienne #emdr #hypnosenice #CPTSD #guerisonemotionnelle #highlysensitive #healingtrauma
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